Thursday, October 26, 2017

broken

It has taken me all week to finally sit down and write this post.  This week (starting Sunday) I have been on an emotional rollercoaster. It all started Sunday when it was supposed to be family  time for us to relax and somehow the day didn't go as I had planned out in my head so it threw us all off.  After Sunday we had to together and separate figure out what to differently.  In a marriage it takes two to change not just one person so starting Monday I had a car ride to myself and had lots of time to think and pray alone ( which is very rare)
I said to my husband on Monday that I felt broken...later in the week I looked up the definition of that word. broken - to not function properly, incomplette, disconnected, weak in strength and spirit. I felt all of these things but i had to somehow get unbroken...I cried out to the Lord several times this week because he is the only one who can complete me and where I feel weak he is strong. I realized this week that sometimes the struggle is real, and sometimes we feel so empty and broken ( yes even us christians) Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding and he will direct your path
I need to trust in the Lord to strengthen me and to help me feel connected..somedays I don't know how so i just cry out to him and ask for his help.
I struggle with feeling completely overwhelmed and then I get sad and have no joy..that's not good! This week it has been worse than it has been in awhile. It has taken effort together but we came to the conclusion together that we have to intentional about our time. Being wise with the time we have is so important for us.
So we have put away phones at certain times, we have talked more and been together more as a family ( because our kids don't believe in naps) In the evenings i have tried to relax a little more...the dishes, the work i need to do the laundry, the house needing picked up, sometimes it can be put on hold for 30 min while I watch boy meets world and relax.
It is such a struggle to get caught up in everything...but just taking it one day at a time.  I'm trying hard to just breath and drink more water. Goals right!?
So am I broken..a little bit but the Lord is strengthening me more each day and I am learning to trust in him with all of my overwhelming things in life.
You might feel broken just today, or for a few weeks or maybe you have felt broken for awhile and don't know what to do.
we have to push ourselves, keep going...God is so much bigger than the rollercoaster ride we might feel like we are on he will strengthen you and me and make us feel complete.  This might take awhile but piece by piece he will connect us and put us back together if we will keep going and keep trusting.
My life lately though its been overwhelming to me it's an overwhelmingly great life. :)
Need proof of how great it is!?
Your life is great to..think about what you have even when things are really hard.

This is me trying to work i walk away to get Kate and Copelan  gets up on the computer desk and gets to my stuff 





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